Breathe

This past weekend, the J/WB YAGM set off for the first half of our closing retreat. We spent three days together, exploring the northern cities of Haifa and Akko, discussing the transitions that lie ahead of us, and celebrating the connections we have formed, both with our host communities and with each other. The end of this chapter is nearing, my friends. Five weeks from today, I will be en route to Duluth, MN, which frankly, doesn't seem real...Whoa.

For those of you who know me well, I struggle with transitions, especially those that require goodbyes. The next few weeks are overwhelmingly difficult for me to comprehend; how am I ever going to say goodbye to the people who have loved me so completely, even before knowing me? How can I leave this land that has now become a part of me, the roads that I have walked, the sights that my eyes have beheld? And yet, as much as my heart is mourning all that must end and change, I am also thrilled at the prospect of stepping off the plane and walking (let's be real, RUNNING) into the arms of my family and loved ones. I'm eager to be home, to be enveloped by the familiar, to invest in the relationships that have carried me through this journey, and to begin to speak on behalf of those who cannot advocate for themselves. But all of that, the goodbyes, the hellos, the changes and the transitions; it's a lot to process right now. 

I'm overwhelmed. I'm full. I am a bundle of questions and emotions. I have so much going through my mind and heart that I don't know where to begin. 

At Concordia, one of my mentors and friends was excellent at reminding me to breathe. He had a way of knowing when it was necessary to tell me to stop my rushing and worrying and just breathe. Funny, that's not something one should forget how to do, but I am guilty of just that. This year has been a reminder of how to breathe fully, deeply, completely, and yet, in the midst of all that lies ahead of me in these next five weeks, I have found myself needing to catch my breath again, to slow down and just breathe.

During our retreat, it was my turn to lead a morning devotion. Being the camp girl that I am, I was digging through old camp resources, and happened upon the Breathe Prayer, which I've used many, many times over the years. Reading through this again gave me an opportunity to name the fears, frustrations, haste, and hurry that fills my mind, and in the midst of it all, to breathe--to be aware of all the gifts that God has given, and to rest in the presence of the One who loves us, formed us, and abides with us.

I would like to share the prayer with you all and invite you to just breathe. I ask for your prayers and support as I and the rest of the YAGM around the world struggle to be present in the moment, despite the demands of transitions and the uncertainty that fills the weeks ahead. Thank you for the love and care you have shown throughout this journey; I could not have done it without each of you. 

The Breathe Prayer

Breathe in the breath of God

Breathe out your cares and concerns

Breathe in the love of God

Breathe out your doubts and despairs

Breathe in the life of God

Breathe out your fears and frustrations

We sit quietly before the One who gives life and love to all creation,

We sit in awe of the One who formed us in our mother’s wombs,

We sit at peace surrounded by the One who fills every fiber of our being.

Breathe in the breath of God

Breathe out your tensions and turmoil

Breathe in the love of God

Breathe out your haste and hurry

Breathe in the life of God

Breathe out your work and worry

We sit quietly before the One who gives life and love to all creation,

We sit quietly in awe of the One who formed us in our mother’s wombs,

We sit at peace surrounded by the One who fills every fiber of our being.

Amen